This week has been rough in many ways. I’m not sure why I expected anything different, considering the way this experience unfolded, and what this experience is. I’m exhausted on many levels, physical, emotional, spiritual. I’ve felt stupid for driving on the wrong side of the road. I’ve felt lost, as I worked with a child with autism. I’ve felt isolated, as I am in a new environment, where I know almost no one. A few tears have come. A few tears have followed the first ones. This is starting to feel like the norm for my life.
This morning, as I take my first day off from work in what feels like eons, while knowing that it’s only been five days, I’ve been spending my morning working to re-center and re-focus. In that process, I came across an email that came to me this week from a New York yoga studio, which I had saved, as I liked the intention behind it. This is what the email told me:
New Moon in Aries – April 18th
“If you’re going to doubt something, doubt your own limits.” Don Ward
Take one risk: “Of course you have to go out on a limb sometimes; that’s where the fruit is.” If you tend to talk yourself out of taking risks, consider the alternative. You could continue to create the same predictable results.
ARIES is the start point.
ARIES is empowerment.
ARIES is the intention to begin something.
ARIES symbolizes the constant experience of “becoming”.
Every child is birthed. Everything has a starting point. This New Moon is giving you an opportunity to wipe a certain slate clean and begin again. It is an ideal time to launch a project or set something new in motion. Aries is giving us the courage to start (again).
I love it when the universe sends notes that feel tailored to me. (And here, where I write universe, I obviously mean yoga studios.) Sometimes, when lost in the challenges, it can become easy to lose sight of the bigger picture, the long term, the intention. I can forget that I made this choice to grow myself, to push myself, and that I walked into it knowing that it wasn’t the easy choice. That was the deal I made with myself, that I would take the risk and trust that I would come out the other side better for it.
I write this today, April 18, and focus on the start point, empowerment, the intention to begin something, the constant experience of “becoming.” And I work to trust that I have the courage to start (again). And if needed, again and again and again… Sometimes, it takes a while to build your wings after you leap.